I have seen the video of the bodies laying dead on the streets of Bucha. I wish I didn’t but I did. I have been angry on and off during this war but seemingly I have now reached some new heights.
In the areas which are now being reclaimed by Ukraine around Kyiv there lay bodies of civilians. One with his hands bound behind his back. Dead.
In my head starts the screaming and in my eyes the tears well up in anger and frustration. Why? Why kill unarmed people? Who could have done this? People write of hatred, here’s some now coursing through my veins. May the soldiers responsible for these murders know the suffering they have caused. Because goddamit why have you done this? You could have simply driven off.
May there be justice.
I take myself out the house without taking my phone and walk off in a huff stomping away my anger. Outside the weather is oblivious to what is going on, a nice sunny day does not match the mood.
I have a problem at work which frustratingly I cannot fix as well which seems completely irrelevant to me right now but it is important. This constant dissonance between the multiple layers of my life is truly astounding even to me as I struggle to keep some order in order to maintain perspective.
Anton’s father calls him to say his grandma has passed away, in a Kyiv old people’s home, they hadn't been able to make it there in time to say their final goodbyes. She had been so ill and so weak it comes with a relief that she is no longer suffering but it is sad. It is sad that a woman who survived so much, the Holodomor, the second world war and that her life had to end during an invasion of her country. Even if she did suffer from severe dementia by the end she was exposed to the sounds of war. I shudder to think what she must have felt.
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